the switch

i didn't hear the click when things switched over, and i don't really know when it happened.

Isaac has been gone over a month now. I really think the more he is gone the more i am convinced he has more blond roots than his sister, but that's a blog for another time! Megan has been in the dorms for over 3 semesters now. Before the first semester at CNC she house sat for the summer over at her grandma's place. So just when did home cease being "home"? I didn't notice this at Christmas break, but that doesn't mean it wasn't true or wasn't switching over.

The flu just had a hit-in-run with Megan. Her Grandma and I convinced Meg to come to her Grandmas' to rest up be nursed. She did and confessed that it really helped her recuperate. I looked up after Meg got back to the dorm at noticed that "she went home to the dorm" and she would "try and come here saturday when she can get away" . To the sappy emotional momma in me, it really took the wind out of me. I guess i should have seen it coming, but i just didn't.

When did this switch over to the other side of the road? Isaac left. Megan slipped away. Isaac was a drive over, drop off, drive away. The drive home and the following week were as painful as a scheduled broken arm. Megan's switch was more slow and subtle. I am still trying to figure out how i ended up with another broken bone when wasn't ready for it. don't i get to recover from the first crack first!!?

Life's not fair and i know this fact, i just i needed to vent about the lack of air i am breathing these days.

It hurts.

I hate this change.